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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
 Posted - 10/26/2009 : 10:11:06 AM
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For the past few weeks someone has been posting a top ten list over on topix. I thought this one was particularly good, so I am posting it here.
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is this week’s Top Ten List, the Top Ten Unanswered Questions of the DeMaria Administration:
#10. Beauty donators want to know, where are the shrubs, the fountains and the lemons?
#9. Aren’t consolidations supposed to save money?
#8. Again, how do you say “ DeMaria”?
#7. Why is it so hard to get things right the first time?(Rotary, ISD, Budget Director, etc.)
#6. Exactly how much money has been COLLECTED in Code Enforcement fines?
#5. What does Matt Laidlaw do for ECTV that justifies his salary being paid from their budget?
#4. Why is time and money being spend fighting a separation incentive award in court when a city councilor got one, no questions asked, when he resigned from his other city job?
#3. GA’head, explain what happened to the water bills.
#2. What and when is something going to be done to address the $3.4 million cut to Everett’s State Aid for FY10?
And the #1 Unanswered Question of the DeMaria Administration, exactly where have the “Days” supposed to have “Gone”?
"Deb"
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 10/30/2009 : 11:23:27 AM
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Here's another one....Kind of funny!!!
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is this week’s third Top Ten List, the Top Ten Reasons Why Choosing between Matewsky and Cardello is so hard:
#10. With her son no longer working for the city, Millie is just so less interesting.
#9. What would City Council agendas be without Wayne?
#8. Without constituent phone calls to answer at the beach, what will Millie do in the summer?
#7. The bricklayers don’t really want Wayne back either.
#6. Millie endorsed by Sergio Cornelio and Joanne Gregory.‘Nuff said.
#5. Both of them are capable of living up the Nuzzo tradition of missing most committee meetings.
#4. With both Wayne and Jason Marcus gone from the BOA, who will provide the comedy?
#3. Even if you question the beauty initiative, I guess you can still get back into Clowno’s good graces.
#2. With little else to do, Wayne’s next attempt to run for State Rep will begin on November 4.
And the #1 reason Why Choosing between Matewsky and Cardello is so hard, I can’t decide between heads or tails either.
"Deb" |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 10/31/2009 : 08:10:39 AM
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from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is a special Halloween Top Ten List, the Top Ten Everett Halloween Costumes:
#10. A scary clown with flowers.
#9. A dumb blonde…but which one? There are a few “good” choices.
#8. A pile of Wood Waste. De-odorized, of course.
#7. A water superintendent. But they come and go so fast, no one knows what they look like.
#6. A pothole. Or in Wayno’s case, tire rims.
#5. A character from “Gone Are the Days”.
#4.“Blank”-enstein’s Monster.
#3. A local government hack or a political wannabe. Choose your favorite, there’s plenty to go around.
#2. A useless City Council agenda item.
And the #1 Everett Halloween Costume,“Dracula” DeMaria, he’s going suck your wallet dry of cash.
"Deb" |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 11/10/2009 : 1:50:19 PM
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Originally posted by Tails.
I saw this on Topix about item# 16 put on the agenda by Jason Marcus, and thought it was little funny, and a little true too.
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is this week Top Ten List, the Top Ten Reasons that the Mayor needs a raise:
#10. With the tax rate going up $2.33, you try paying the tax bill on Casa DeMaria.
#9. He’s saving up to get his master’s degree at clown college.
#8. Sick of being made fun of by Curatone and Dolan.(Here’s a hint; they still will.)
#7. A rising tide lifts all boats...and salaries.
#6. Wants to fund a personal study to figure out where the “days” have “gone”.
#5. Found out that he can’t declare Mangan and Puleo as dependents.
#4. The Everett newspapers are “turning the screws” more and more every week.
#3. Ego demands that he gets a bigger pension base than Hanlon and Ragucci.
#2. Otherwise, he’s going to cut back to a 1 hour work day so that he can make a living wage.
And the #1 Reason that the Mayor needs a raise,‘Cuz Jason Marc-ASS Said So!!
"Deb" |
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Tails
Administrator
2682 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2009 : 1:45:09 PM
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I read these on Topix and think they are hysterical.
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is this week’s Top Ten List, the Top Ten New Polls that Question needs to post:
#10. What will Wayne Matewsky do on his “Free” Monday nights after all these years?
#9. How pissed is Mike Marchese that his (alright, Melissa Murphy’s) pit bull ordinance got shot down by the Common Council?
#8. What will be the next issue that Lou Sierra can’t get resolved?
#7. When will the Everett Citizen web site provide any actual proof of their claims?
#6. What’s the over/under on the police being called to break up a fist fight at a Charter Review Commission meeting?
#5. How much does “The Mayah” hate the nickname “Clowno”?
#4. Has Sal DiDomenico updated his resume yet?
#3. How will Anthony Ranieri spend his unemployment money?
#2. Who wins a steel cage triple-threat match between Stat, FFF and Phillips?
And the #1 New Poll that Question needs to post, why does Question post so many polls and think that we can’t read the results for ourselves? |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2009 : 3:12:18 PM
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These top ten lists crack me up. Someone is very clever!
"Deb" |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2009 : 11:37:17 AM
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From Topix:
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is this week’s special Thanksgiving’s Top Ten List, the Top Ten Reasons to be thankful that you live in Everett:
#10. The free comedy almost every Monday night.
# 9. The low tax rate…Oh, wait…Sorry. Got that one from an old Thanksgiving list. Very old.
# 8. The general apathy that’s taken ahold of the city keeps voting lines short.
# 7. There’s so much to complain about.
# 6. Three Everett newspapers ensure complete, unbiased coverage of local events.
# 5. 25 constituent service directors on the City Council. Screw that legislation stuff.
# 4. Qualified, forgiving (in some cases at least) School Committee members.
# 3. Charter Review is here! And it’s not an absolute debacle…yet.
# 2. A State Rep and State Senator that are always in the news.
And the #1 reason to be thankful that you live in Everett, The “Bestest Mayah Ev Va”!
" Send in the Clowns " |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2009 : 1:11:59 PM
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I missed this one from last Friday:
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is a special Friday Top Ten List, the Top Ten Reasons to read the favorite local paper of Joe Guiliano’s dog, The Everett Advocate, every week:
#10. You enjoy reading “the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind”.
#9. It’s on the School Department’s required reading list.
#8. Because fiction is stranger than truth, not the other way around.
#7. To learn a new method of evisceration every week.
#6. You can’t get enough of the usual FFF Photo Fiesta.
#5. Their constant grammar and spelling errors make you feel better about your own shortcomings.
#4. Imagine...a bastion of unbiased journalism in your own hometown...I said imagine!
#3. You’re waiting for the week when the front page is made up entire of ads.
#2. The holiday Rite-Aid booze ads. Nothing says Mother’s Day and Easter like beer, wine and liquor.
And the #1 reason to read the Everett Advocate every week, you only have time to read half the story anyways.
" Send in the Clowns " |
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Paul
Senior Member
158 Posts |
Posted - 11/25/2009 : 9:16:44 PM
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 11/25/2009 : 10:17:22 PM
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He is a member of the school committee who made a reference that his dog like to use the Advocate to do his "duty".
" Send in the Clowns " |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 11/30/2009 : 1:38:31 PM
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Latest "Top Ten"
from the home office in Everett, MA. Since Charter Review is the only game in town tonight, here now is this week’s Top Ten List, the Top Ten “Out-of-the-Box” Ideas for the Charter Review Commission to consider:
#10. Absentee ballots should be abolished because FFF doesn’t like them.
#9. If the Common Council survives, only pit bulls should be elected to those seats.
#8. Candidates for Mayor should have to vow not to give speech therapy lessons (“Say it with me…DeMaria”) at City Council meetings.
#7. The lemon should become the new city seal; “Gone are the days…” should be the new city motto.
#6. City Council members should no longer be allowed to transfer to a full-time city job. Instead, they’ll just be given a pension
at a full-time salary amount; just saves time.
#5. The School Department should be empowered to run the School Committee rather it being the other way around. Might as well make it formal.
#4. All three local newspapers should comprise a new city department, the Mayor’s Office of Blatant Propaganda. The city’ll make out like bandits on this one with charge backs to the School Department.
#3. The Mayor’s term of office should be extended to four years but only after the politicians of the city rise above the level of political hacks.
#2. The School Department will be put in charge of elections as they seem to be the only ones in the city that can turn out a crowd.
And the #1 “Out-of-the-Box” Idea for Charter Review, three words,“Emperor Paul Schlosberg”.
" Send in the Clowns " |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 12/07/2009 : 11:01:16 AM
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This weeks top ten list from Topix:
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Have you noticed how, more and more every week, the Mayor attaches his name to anything in the city that he thinks is beneficial? Here now is a special Top Ten List, the Top Ten Rejected Uses of the Mayor’s Name:
#10. Mayor DeMaria’s City of Potholes
#9. Mayor DeMaria’s “We’ll Get It Right the Second or Third Time…Maybe” Program
#8. Mayor DeMaria’s Anger Management Program for Department Heads
#7. Mayor DeMaria’s Extensive, World-Wide Search Recruiting Program
#6. Mayor DeMaria’s Name Pronunciation Lessons
#5. Mayor DeMaria’s Favors for City Council Votes Program
#4. Mayor DeMaria’s “Where Have the Days Gone?” Search Program
#3. Mayor DeMaria’s “Sometimes, I Confuse Myself” Presentations
#2. Mayor DeMaria’s Salary Inflation Program
And the #1 rejected use of the Mayor’s name: Mayor DeMaria’s Water and Tax Bills
" Send in the Clowns " |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 12/21/2009 : 07:59:26 AM
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…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is a special Top Ten List, the Top Ten Everett Inspired Holiday songs:
#10. Ave DeMaria
#9. Deck the Polls (With Absentee Ballots)
#8. Silent Charter
#7. You’re a Mean One, FFF
#6. Wayno Got His Rims Fixed in the Rain Dear
#5. Here We Come A-CORI’ing
#4. We Need a Lot Less Marc-ASS
#3. Carol of the “Days”(“Gone are Days, Gone are Days…”)
#2. Anthony’s Not Coming To Town
And the #1 Everett Inspired Holiday song, Clowno, The Dim-Wit Mayor (which will be making its Topix debut later this week.)
" Send in the Clowns " |
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 12/29/2009 : 11:11:25 AM
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Posted on Topix.
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is the first of two year-end Top Ten Lists, the Top Ten Everett highlights (or lowlights, depending on your POV) of 2009.
#10. Blanks became the new “NO!”
#9. The Everett Advocate retained its title of the favorite newspaper of Joe Guiliano’s dog and Stat haters everywhere.
#8. The lemons and urns finally disappeared from the rotary. But the flowers are for-eva.
#7. The City Council proved that they weren’t housebroken when it came to the Pit Bull ordinance.
#6. The poorly-conceived Employee Incentive Program managed to reduce the city’s head count by giving money to, among others, a policeman that had been reinstated to his job
under dubious circumstances less than a year before and a Common Councilor so that he’d give up his other city job.
#5. Carnac says “Water Bill, Water Supervisor and Water Joke”. The question? Name a Cardello, a position that the city can’t keep filled and the administration’s newest nickname.
#4. The city did the impossible by absorbing a huge local aid cut without making any significant cuts to the budget while communities
all around us struggled with their aid cuts. Or was the inevitable just delayed?
#3. Charter Review finally became a reality and another name recognition/popularity contest was held to choose its commission members. Will we ever learn?
#2. Most of the piles finally disappeared from Wood Waste, years ahead of the schedule laid out in the “tough” agreement negotiated by His Honah.
And the #1 Everett highlight (or lowlight) of 2009,“The “Days” are still “Gone”.(Yeah, right!)
" Send in the Clowns " |
Edited by - massdee on 12/29/2009 4:28:33 PM |
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just wondering
Senior Member
387 Posts |
Posted - 12/29/2009 : 2:32:44 PM
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massdee
Moderator
5299 Posts |
Posted - 01/01/2010 : 03:30:57 AM
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And part two from Topix:
…from the home office in Everett, MA. Here now is the second of two special year-end Top Ten Lists, the Top Ten Everett Personalities of 2009 (or at least the ones that are easiest to make fun of):
#10. Lou Sierra - Couldn’t get a blue snow light at Nichols and Malden. Couldn’t get sidewalks fixed on Mt Washington Street. But he gets re-elected. I’m glad I don’t live in Ward Two. He’s just the tip of the iceberg there.
#9. Billy Cardello – The de-facto permanent president of the Common Council, trying to run every meeting from the floor. Remember when he wanted dogs illegally in parks to be muzzled? Can’t make this stuff up. Who does he want to sell the old High School to? Wish he’d stop yelling into the microphone.
#8. FFF - In June, he made the Guinness Book of World Records by getting over 150 pictures of himself in the local papers in one week. Rumor is he’ll be demanding CORI reports for anyone that wants to attend the inauguration at the High School.
#7. Sam Amado – Didn’t meet the advertised criteria by a mile but still got the job. He must have a pretty good idea of where the “Days” are hiding.
#6. Sergio Cornelio – Nice of His Honah’s “Little Buddy” to take a Separation Incentive to give up his second city job. The city service vehicles are happy he’s gone. The rumors of him being in line for the Common Council presidency down the line is the best argument yet to get rid of the Common Council.
#5. Rosa DiFlorio – Wants to “Work with the Mayah” but can’t even say his name correctly. That speech therapy lesson was a riot. Rumored to be the next Common Council president. I’m beating the rush and stocking up on aspirin now.
#4. Matt Laidlaw –“Poster Boy”(for everything that’s wrong with city government) continued to suck his salary out of the ECTV budget while he does nothing but take creepy looking pictures and write press releases that give His Honah credit for anything even remotely positive.
#3. Frank Nuzzo - Became the latest member of the “Screw the Taxpayers, Pad My Pension” Club in order to cover up the almost-hiring of a known ethics violator as Code Enforcement director. Nice “Damage Control”.
#2. Melissa Murphy – It has never been officially announced but she got her dream job as “The Empress of Everett”. Thought she was running the city before that anyways. Now, she’ll get paid more to surf the net and tell us how wrong and bitter we are. Definitely knows where the “Days” have “Gone”.
And the #1 Everett Personality of 2009, Clowno – After months of bashing, what more needs or can be said? Don’t worry though. I’m positive that much more material is on the way in 2010.
(Yeah, I know Marc-ASS (among others) could/should have been on the list but I couldn’t be bothered to waste the keystrokes on him in particular.)
" Send in the Clowns " |
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